Child Birth (What No One Talks About)

Hey guys! I’m currently waiting to be let into my six week postpardum appointment and I find myself reminiscing about my labor and after birth. I figured what a better topic to write about while the memories are flowing? Here goes….

1. You’ll Be Starving While You’re In Labor

Twelve+ hours not eating? Literally my worst nightmare. I recommend eating a protein bar (or something simular). Nothing too heavy though! You may throw it up in labor.

2. The Nurses And Doctors Yell At You During Birth

You’d think they’d be less aggressive to a lady squeezing a baby out but… No. They made me panic like crazy. I don’t handle agression at all.

3. You May Not Want Your Significant Other There.

…mine was laughing. While the idea of having the love of your life beside you during this important moment may sound ideal, you may not want them there in reality. With both pregnancies I kicked him out halfway through. It’s HARD to focus on pushing and breathing! If they’re the kind of person to distract you or make you feel uncomfortable I say kick em out!

4. Nurse and Doctor Lingo

With my son they kept telling me he was “in distress” which made me freak out. They said it over and over and I couldn’t help but think HELP HIM THEN! But everything turned out ok in the end.

5. You Have No Control Over Your Bladder

You know when you’re about to go on a road trip and you tell the kids in the car to ‘try’ to go to the bathroom? That’s your new life, baby! You seriously don’t feel the urge at all. If you don’t go to the bathroom every two hours or so after birth you will pee yourself. It’s the ugly truth.

6. …. Back to food

You will eat literally anything after labor including half eaten, ice cold misu soup. And it will be delicious.

7. Healing Is Intense

I don’t know about you but I naively thought the healing process would be much better. I never really researched it but you know me being me I just assumed. None of my relatives really talked about it so I thought labor was pretty much the end of it.

It’s brutal. Especially the first time. Ice pads, Witchhazel, a squirt bottle and Ibuprofen are your new best friends. Oh and LOOSE clothes. (Are you taking notes?)

I’m sure there’s more but we gotta leave you alone surprises, right?

Thanks for reading! And if you’re pregnant or thinking about getting pregnant… Good luck!

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